communication

Living in the Present with Patience, hard work and Love

I am so delighted to see your progress.  You’ve gotten engaged after patiently cultivating your relationship.  Persistently seeing your future in front of you.  You didn’t give up on each other and now you can enjoy your engagement and plan your marriage.  I love seeing your happiness.

You’ve gotten that promotion that you have worked hard for and thought would never come.  You showed up every day.  You did your best job each day and now, you are seeing fruit from your labor.

You’ve finished another semester and you persevered through that class that was so hard for you.  I’m so proud of your efforts.  You are another step closer to your degree.

You had a difficult semester.  Now you are picking yourself up and planning your next steps forward.  I know this is hard for you and I believe that you can find your way.  You’ll need to think through your options and explore your path.  You can do this.

Your friends are all starting to buy houses, have kids, adopt pets, getting better jobs… it is easy to compare and wish and feel dissatisfied.  Your self talk can become bitter,  envious or it can be content and joy-filled as you help your friends celebrate their successes.  You will achieve your own dreams in your own time.  Be patient.

As the year comes to an end, it is natural for us to look back and assess where we have come.  We can easily brush past our joys and focus instead our sorrows or mistakes, on that pound or two that we didn’t take off, on the debt that we didn’t make as much progress on as we hoped.

What I say to you is that  December 31 is really just another day.  January 1, follows.  What really matters is how I live each day.  Setting my goals and then living to fulfill those goals one day at a time.  Serving God, serving my neighbor, and living in gratitude for all that I have and all that I get to be.

My prayer for you as one year ends and another begins is that you may live in the present moment.  Never wishing away a single minute.  Do the work you have to do this day.  Appreciate the joys and help each other through the sorrows.  Your attitude is your choice and your future depends on how you live this present moment.

Each morning, look back at yesterday for what you have to learn and then let it go.  Pause a moment and think about tomorrow and the direction you are heading.  Then let it be in the future.  Look at how you want to live today, plan today and then act.  Live each moment:  See, feel, hear, smell, taste.  Let your moments be alive and live them with intention.

Don’t be afraid to work hard, ask for help and reach for your dreams.

Dear God, help each of us to live in the present.  Help us to see you in our lives and walk each day with you.  Help us to thank you for all that you do for us.  Help us to be patient as your plan for us unfolds.  Help us to love others.  Help us to be truly ourselves as we trust in you.  God bless the coming year one day at a time in Jesus name.  Amen.

Love, Mymom

 

Addictions or False Gods

How I wish I could help you with your addiction!   It is easy to see the addictions in others.  Unfortunately, addictions are difficult to recognize in ourselves.  We all fall prey to addictions.   You might be addicted to video games, gambling, TV, shopping, people, sex, have an eating disorder, be a workaholic, an alcoholic, be addicted to prescription drugs, tobacco, chewing tobacco, food, exercise, the list goes on and on.  If you are addicted to one thing, you are most likely susceptible to other addictions.

Addictions are anything we obsess about and put as most important in our lives.  Addictions are our false Gods.  They prevent us from seeing what God wants us to do today or prevent us from turning to God in our need.  When I am troubled and should be turning to God in prayer, asking for His help, I turn instead to TV, shopping, video games, tobacco, or any number of false Gods.

The best remedy for your addiction that I know of is recognizing it.  Seeing that we are putting something or someone before God.  Then we need to seek him in prayer.  There is something that God wants us to do today.  Our addictions prevent us from praying and seeking the will of God in our lives.

For very difficult issues like alcoholism, see the Twelve Step program.  http://www.aa.org/.  See also the book, Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions.  You may benefit from counseling regarding your addiction.  Has it taken over your life so that you can’t function without it?  Seek help.

The first commandment that God gave to Moses was “I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.  You shall have no other gods before me.”   Exodus 20:1-2

In Matthew’s Gospel 22:37-38, Jesus tells us “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment.”

God wants to help us.  He wants to be our light and our salvation.  Pay attention to who or what you turn to when you are stressed, troubled, hurting, anxious… Turn to God in prayer.  Spend time with God and He will give you rest.

Dear God, help us to see our addictions.  Help us to see the areas of our life where we need healing.  Help us to seek you in all things and to turn away from our addictions or false gods.  Help us to seek you and you alone, through Jesus Christ our Lord, Amen.

Love and prayers,

Mymom

 

 

Love is patient, love is kind

1st Corinthians 13.4, Love is patient, Love is kind, it is not jealous. It is not pompous. It is not inflated.

St. Paul’s words to the Corinthians is posted on my bathroom wall to be read often. I am so often impatient, unkind, jealous, righteous, and full of myself that I worry if I will ever get it right. When Paul spoke of Love, he was speaking of Jesus. Reread the passage substituting the word Jesus. It totally fits. Jesus is love.
Substitute your own name and reread the passage. I do that and see my inadequacies clearly. I see where I can love better. And reading it with Jesus’ name reminds me how He loves me even though I don’t love as I want to love. Jesus is patient with me. He is kind.

Oh God. Help me to love others and myself the way you love through Jesus Christ our Lord.  Amen.

How am I doing at work?

My advice is – Don’t compare yourself to others. Whatever your job is, do your best each day and ask for help when you need it. If you do that and you enjoy most days, then you may be in the right place at the right time and the experience is good. Keep in perspective what is within your control and what isn’t. Be sure to track your wins each day so they aren’t taken for granted. Then when you have an opportunity for performance review, you have your notes to work with. Even challenging situations are an opportunity to track how you turned around or dealt with a challenging situation. This can be used for your weekly meeting with your boss, performance reviews and for resumes. I always have a list of 2-3 things to tell my boss and any open questions that I have when I meet with him.

Let us pray, Oh God, thank you for our opportunities. keep us focused on today and today’s interactions. Help us to build good relationships, let go of yesterday, and let tomorrow be in your capable hands.
We ask for your peace through Christ our Lord. Amen

Be True to Your Faith in God

I am uncompromising about my belief in God. In the Holy Trinity: God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. I believe that Jesus leads us to the Father. I believe that developing my relationship with Jesus through my prayer life is the most important thing that I do each moment of each day. Brother Lawrence learned how to be in His Holy presence at all times, even when doing simple, menial work. Do all things as if doing them for Jesus. See the Practice of the Presence of God.

It isn’t ok to ignore Jesus in your day or save Him for when you occasionally go to mass. Worse, to be vague about your belief at all. I have talked with Christians, especially Catholic Christians who are lazy about their belief or who want to be popular with the crowd who believe that Jesus just doesn’t matter.

As for me, I will serve The Lord. I don’t get to speak for my children any more. They are grown. I will never stop praying for their continuous growth and conversion to a beautiful life filled with Jesus.

Don’t be lukewarm about your faith. Jesus deserves so much more. Turn to Him and He will forgive your apathy and welcome you back. Join me in worshiping our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

Oh God, forgive us for our Apathy, for the time we chose not to go to mass even for just one hour a week. Forgive us for the times we took you for granted and failed to worship you. Forgive us for denying you and help us instead to be aware of you in each breath we take. To shout out, My Lord and My God. In Jesus Holy Name. Amen.

Love, Mymom

Transitions make us anxious

Transitions can be hard for most people. We resist ending one thing and moving on to something new. We feel angst. We feel uncomfortable. We may be excited or sad. However we feel, those around us will sense our uneasiness. They may not understand and may feel distance when really, we are trying to hide our anxiety.

Actually, we can’t hide anxiety. Most of us wear our anxiety all over our faces and in our body language. People we love the most may take our anxiety personally and think our stress is about them.

Children especially will see and feel our stress and the children in your life need you to communicate.
So does your spouse or girlfriend or boyfriend. Talk about how you feel and what is next. Talk about specific actions you will be taking and ask for help along the way. Remember you are loved and you are not alone.

Oh God, help me to communicate with my family and friends. Help me to ask for help from you and those who care about me. Thank you Father for your steadfast love through Jesus our Lord, amen

Love, Mymom

Beware of Group Think

I was recently watching The Wolf of Wall Street, about debauchery, deception, hard selling tactics that capitalize on greed. It was the worst movie I’ve ever seen in terms of the language, sex, drugs, and overall sinful , moral less behavior. It was repugnant and I was very disappointed. I should have turned it off. I actually felt sick to my stomach at the depravity of so many people willing to follow a bad leader.

When money and greed are your idols, God is not present. When group think sets in, we let our guard down. We think we can behave badly because others are behaving badly. This group think has been around forever. The bible is full of stories of group think, people behaving badly and God’s disappointment with his children. Jesus died to set us free from
the trap of sin that spirals out of control. When we turn to Jesus, or when we are humbled and brought low and look up to see Jesus, he is there with us. He forgives us and tells us to forgive others. “Let him who is without sin cast the first stone…Has no one condemned you? Then neither do I condemn you, Go and sin no more”.

I don’t recommend the movie mentioned. It does not entertain and there is no good message in it. Buyer Beware. Hollywood’s Best Picture nomination and rating system are very flawed.

Let us pray. Oh God, guard us from Group Think and bad behavior. Help us to think of you and things above. May your hand be upon us keeping us from evil that we may do no harm. Help us to turn away from our sin and turn to you through Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior. Amen.

Be careful out there.

Love, Mymom

Meanness

Mean or snide comments are mean and snide. What are we thinking when we make them?? We are all guilty of making “funny” remarks at the expense of others. Guess what – those comments are sinful and hurt others. Don’t do it. Just don’t be the devil’s voice in the world. As for forgiveness if this is you. Apologize. Encourage each other and build each other up. Kind words. Remember “if you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all”.

When we are the victims of mean or snide comments, resist the urge to retort angrily. Take a deep breath and ask God to help you to forgive. That person may not know how badly they hurt you with the mean comment. Be courageous and tell them. Remember Jesus loves you truly. You are a cherished child of the one true King, Jesus. Peace be with you.

Oh God, help me speak kindly and listen with forgiving ears today. Help me to use positive self talk when thinking of what was said to me and let go of the hurt. Help me to rest in the knowledge that you love us both. In Jesus Holy name. Amen.

Love, Mymom

Build each other up

Relationships are not a competition. There is no room for sarcasm, cynicism, or meanness. When you feel hurt, as simply and honestly as possible, say “ouch, that comment hurt. Was it your intention to hurt me?” When we feel hurt, we often want to give an angry or sarcastic retort back. Resist that sin and instead turn the other cheek as Jesus taught. Seek to understand. Communicate bravely your very vulnerable feelings. Love. Build each other up with loving words. Peace be with you. Let us pray. Oh God, please help us to listen as you listen, to pray for your help before speaking, to love as you love through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Love, Mymom

Forgiveness

Think about the rude person you work with, the mean kids in middle school, your ex friends who hurt you, your mom who you never seem to please, your absent dad, your husband or wife or boyfriend or girlfriend who did the unforgivable, the driver who flipped you off, your boss who is too demanding or not demanding enough, yourself for your owns sins of bossiness, gossip, meanness, stealing, lying, laziness, betrayal, the list goes on and on. Sin abounds. Small sins we Catholics call venial or great sins we call mortal. Sin abounds. The great news is that we can forgive others and we can be forgiven. When we fail to forgive others, that is our sin. Jesus can help us to forgive them if we ask for his help. Jesus will forgive us when we are sorry and ask for forgiveness.
Jesus died to wash away our sins and our guilt.

I’m preparing for the beautiful sacrament of reconciliation this evening. What a lovely thing: To reflect on the things I’ve done http://four.mary.org failed to do and to ask for forgiveness. To hear the wise counsel of our priest be forgiven and begin anew.

Thank you Jesus for your sacrifice, forgiveness, renewal, and for Reconciliation. In Jesus Holy Name, Amen.
Love, Mymom

P.s. For those of you who haven’t been in a while, reconciliation is another name for confession or penance. The format is still the same but we can sit facing the priest or sit or kneel behind a screen. It is our choice. We can go at a scheduled time or we can call our church to make an appointment with our priest. Come back to this beautiful sacrament. Peace be with you.